Why You?
by CrazySuperHeroine
Summary: "I knew I should've pulled him aside and demand answers to that question but I didn't want to make things tense between us. I could already feel our bond threatening to snap as it is and I couldn't bear losing Phil, not when I've found the one person my whole being was made for." - Phan. Phil's been acting weird. Will Dan find out why?


"Why you?"

I glanced up from my slouched position on the couch, my index fingers hovering over the mouse pad of my laptop as my mouth fell open. I saw a flash of my roommate's black hair disappear past the wall leading down the hallway to our rooms, a groan quickly followed before he slammed his bedroom door shut.

I shook my head and resumed scrolling through Tumblr, ignoring the conscience gnawing at the back of my head, screaming at me to ask the other what was wrong.

I knew I should've pulled him aside and demand answers to that question but I didn't want to make things tense between us. I could already feel our bond threatening to snap as it is and I couldn't bear losing Phil, not when I've found the one person my whole being was made for. What would my life be like without Phil?

_Empty._

I cringed. It was then his sentence replayed in my head, the only thing that has left his mouth since a few weeks ago. I was in the midst of scrolling through Twitter when Phil came into my bedroom, creepily stared at me for a few minutes and walked out, mumbling, "_Why you?_"

At first, I had replied with, "Because I'm the fucking sun from the Teletubbies."

Purely out of humour, of course. I figured that my best friend was just joking with me. It wasn't until the time I caught a flash of sadness in his deep blue eyes that I realised Phil wasn't kidding.

We were cooking dinner together; a rare event, indeed. Both of us had barely any knowledge, unless it was Delia Smith's recipe. However, it was one of those days when Phil and I were too lazy to go out to eat and we were _finally_ sick of takeaways.

I don't remember how we got onto the subject but, while I was stirring some soup, we stumbled upon the topic of our fandom. Immediately, without thinking, I blurted, "They're hilarious sometimes. It's not like Phan's ever going to cannon, right? But, I do like the artwork and fanfictions written. Those are good."

I turned around just in time to catch Phil's lips tug down to a frown and his eyes cast to the floor. He excused himself with a wave of his hand and ran up to his room, where he stayed until I called out to him, stating that dinner was ready.

Even then, he remained silent.

That, alone, was worrying. The ebony-haired boy could never shut up, whether it was to tell me something I probably had heard before or just to be his annoying, innocent self.

The fact that I haven't been hit in the face with neither a pillow, Totoro nor Lion was another telltale sign.

A quick _ping_ disrupted my thoughts on my roommate. A notification flashed on the screen of my phone. I pushed my laptop off my stomach and grabbed the device, where a reminder remained, text in bold.

_**Get things ready for the radio show tomorrow!**_

I groaned and slapped my forehead, my eyes now on the ticking wall clock. I've wasted more than half of my day asleep, and it was currently six in the evening. I had _nothing_. _Way to go, Dan. You had one fucking job. Thank God Phil set the reminder for me before this situation began_.

I got off the couch and walked up to my best friend's door, ready to pretend that I hadn't notice his sudden change in behaviour. "Phil? We need ideas for tomorrow's show," I called out, my fingers curled in as I knocked on the boy's door. No reply. "Phil, I'm coming in."

I heard the bed creak just as I swung the door open, unveiling a flustered Phil, his eyes bloodshot and puffy, face blotched, swollen and damp. He tried to shield his face with Totoro as he leaned forward, his chest almost touching his crossed legs.

I froze, both at the shock of what I had witnessed as well as the sensation of my heart breaking that overwhelmed me. The dark-haired boy was shaking, his grip around the poor grey doll tight enough to suffocate it, if it were alive. His fists were clenched tautly, his knuckles slowly turning white.

It wasn't until I heard the undeniable choke of Phil's sob that I finally snapped out of my trance and rushed to his side. I rested the palm of my hand on his shoulder slowly, flinching away when my best friend tensed under my touch.

"Hey, what's wrong?" I whispered, placing my hands next to his knee instead. When all he did was shake his head, I sighed. "Come on, Phil. You've barely spoken a word to me and you're rarely around. You have yet to hit me with something. Now I find you crying in your room. Something's definitely wrong."

Phil still said nothing, his face buried into the softness of Totoro's fur. I brought my legs up and hugged my knees with one hand whilst the other was petting his soft black hair. I held back a frown when my best friend tried to avoid my touch and pretended not to notice, continuing my actions. "Please, Phil? Did I- Did I do something wrong?" I asked, my voice reduced to a squeak as I tried to remember what I could have done. I came up with none and sighed. Again. "I'm talking to you, Phil Lester. Come on, talk to your best friend, would you?"

"Why you?"

I arched my eyebrow at the back of his head, running my fingers calmly through his hair. "What's wrong with me? I didn't finish up your cereal, I swear!" I tried to joke, hoping it would lighten the mood.

It didn't work. Instead, I had a handful of Phil shoved onto me. His blue eyes glistened with tears. "Why did I have to agree to live with you? I could've gotten Peej or Chris or anyone else! Why you?" the ebony-haired boy raged, my shirt balled up in his shaky fists. "Of all the people in the world, I had to move in with _you_!"

"Hey! I-"

"Living with you has been nothing but a _pain_! You're an oblivious twat! So, why do I still _want_ to be by your side? Why is it that you're so hard to get rid of? I can't stand the heartache, the insecurity. Why can't I just kick you out?" Phil's eyes closed as he took a deep breath. His lips quivered as he tried to hold himself back. "Why do I still love you?"

"What?" My eyes nearly bulged out of their sockets as I stared at my best friend in disbelief. Things were slowly falling into place now. The reaction to my statement in the kitchen, the longing looks I'd catch from the corner of my eye, the fact that Phil loved to huddle into me. "You're- _What_?"

"It's like I can't even look at you without wanting to tear my heart out and present it to you as a gift! Or use it to whack you in the face in hopes that it would help open up your eyes and see that I've been into you since the day we met!" The tears he desperately held back began flowing down his cheeks and onto my shirt. "I want to leave, all the time! But, the second I see you and your stupid, toothy smile and that mischievous glint in your brown eyes, all thoughts of getting away leaves my head! If it isn't bad enough living with you, I work with you too! I can't take this anymore, Dan!"

"Phil, don't," I paused and wrapped my arms around his tiny body. "Don't cry, please. I don't know what to do here."

"I'm sorry," he cried, wriggling free from my embrace. "I'm sorry. I'm such a freak for falling for my own best fr-"

Phil's eyes widened when my lips touched his. Wide enough to cause him to lose balance of his body and fall off his own bed. I looked down at him in shock of what I've done before sitting up. "D-Don't. Don't do this t-to me," the older boy whimpered, shifting his gaze onto the floor. He bit on his lower lip nervously. "Don't kiss me out of pity, Daniel. Please."

I froze as my heart and mind finally agreed on the weird feelings I've been having. Oh God. My breath hitched as the thoughts raced in my head. _Oh my God, I really have been an oblivious twat._

I gripped his forearms before my best friend could curl himself into an indestructible ball. "Oi, don't shut me out again," I warned, pulling a pissed expression when Phil looked up at me. I softened when his blue eyes became misty and his lower lip jutted out into a pout. "Phil, don't make that face. I'm begging you."

The face remained, causing me to sigh deeply and smack my forehead. "For God's sake."

"I'm sorry," he whispered right away, his voice shaky as though in fear of me. He averted his eyes. I pulled him back onto his bed and gently kissed his forehead before pulling him into a bone-crushing hug. The surprised squeak made me chuckle, which turned into a heart-warming smile when Phil unconsciously wiggled his body closer to mine.

The warmth radiating off the ebony-haired boy was comforting; different but something my body had grown accustomed to. We stayed still, Phil slumped against my embrace, and me just stroking his soft hair whilst humming under my breath. I began thinking of ways to make it up to him, something small but meaningful.

Not that I could come up with any on such short notice. I'm probably going to google ideas later tonight.

What erupted through the silence was the loud shrill of our doorbell, causing both of us to snap our heads towards the entrance of Phil's bedroom. He immediately jumped out of my arms and rushed to his desk, grabbing his wallet, freaking out like the house caught fire.

"Phil?" I asked, standing up as I watched him fumble with a decent amount of cash. "What are you doing?"

His blue eyes met mine and he smiled sheepishly, his tongue poking out the side of his lips. "I ordered pizza for dinner. Didn't want you setting fire to the house. Hope you don't mi-"

An idea sparked in my head.

I rolled my eyes playfully at his insult and told him to give me a minute as I ran down to the front door, reaching for the emergency supply of cash I kept near the kitchen. I grabbed the delivery and paid the man off, telling him to keep the change. I turned around, and looked at Phil questioningly as he stood a few feet away with an equally puzzled expression.

"What?" I asked, dumping the boxes onto the kitchen counter. I opened one of them and grinned. "Hell yeah! My favourite!"

"Why'd you rush to pay for the food?" Phil questioned. When I stared at him incredulously, he raised his hands in defeat and quickly added, "Not that I mind, really. But, I did order them."

I scratched the back of my head and shrugged. "Well, I've been a major twat lately and I needed to redeem my sins," I reasoned, opening my arms for my best friend to step between them. "Forgive me?"

"That's bribery," Phil grunted. However, the slight smile of his lips was obvious as he clung onto me for dear life. "Why you?" he muttered, this time a hint of playfulness evident in his voice as he snuffled his face into my chest.

I smirked. "Because you love me," I replied simply. When Phil looked up at me expectantly, I leaned forward and pecked him, savouring the taste of his lips. "And because I love you too."

**A/N : Hi! This is my first Phanfic, so I hope you enjoyed it. I tried not to make it cliche but ... I think it turned out that way. Uh... Yep. The idea came about when my best friend & I were joking around about how Phil reacts to Dan sometimes.**

**Just teenage girls being teenage girls, yakno?**

**But in all honesty, thank you to Emmy a.k.a emliguori on Twitter for betareading & being the root cause of this fic.**

**Read, Review & Follow! I'll try writing more Phan, seeing as how I'm writing Kames already. Much love! :3**


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